Gingerbread voodoo

Neoliberalism, with its dynamic and multi-faceted form, is difficult to get hold of. Gingerbread voodoo is a superb tool against the harmful consequences of neoliberal ideology. By performing this ritual, which has a demonstrable empowering effect, you can return the bad energy someone has inflicted on you, the society or the planet back to where it belongs.

Introduction

Inspired by the French Revolution, the slaves in Haiti fought for the country’s independence, which it became on January 1st, 1804. It also became the first country to ban slavery. None of the surrounding countries would recognize Haiti as an independent state as they feared that the rebellion could inspire their own slaves.

Finally, in 1825, France agreed to recognize Haiti in exchange for the country paying a debt to France of 150 million francs for France’s «loss of property», i.e. the slaves. This is the only time in world history that whoever has won a war has had to pay reparations to the losing party. The debt, which corresponds to around 20 billion Euros in today’s value, the country struggled to pay for over a hundred years, until 1947. It is still the cause of Haiti’s misery.

After the year 2000, Haiti requested France for compensation for the injustice suffered by the slaves, but no answer has yet come from the Elysée Palace.

Voodoo is a form of religion practiced among descendants of slaves in several Caribbean countries. It has its roots back to thousand-year-old West African nature religions and is mixed with Catholicism. It is a conglomeration of several traditions and faiths, which makes it very dynamic and at the same time difficult to grasp, but all the better suited as a tool against neoliberalists, neoliberal ideology and its harmful consequences.

Gingerbread voodoo – a well-proven Nordic variant – is excellent for disarming all kinds of tormentors and abusers of power; be it neoliberals, market liberals, or anyone else who in pure selfishness promotes attitudes that sow discord, tear down democratic institutions, drive reckless privatization of public goods, exploit public infrastructure or shared natural resources, or it could be a sulking tax evader. If you lack ideas, you can always have a look in The coloring booklet against neoliberalism.

Contents

A small gingerbread form and a bag containing pre-mixed flour, sugar and spices – only liquid and a little butter or margarine must be added.

Instructions

Think of a person who you believe exploits the community’s resources or who is in some way harmful to the planet, who sows discord or breaks down democracy, crushes unions, lacks empathy or the ability to care. Concentrate on this person’s bad energy while doing the following:

1. Preheat the oven to 190°C and melt 0.5 g of butter or margarine in a small saucepan.

2. Mix in 0.75 ml of milk (plant-based milk also works well).

3. Empty the contents of the bag into the pot and stir until you have a firm dough. 4. Add a secret object that is related to the person you want to strike. If you cannot get close enough to obtain biological material, a newspaper picture or a name written down on a small piece of paper can also do.

4. Add a secret object that is related to the person you want to strike. If you cannot get close enough to obtain biological material, a newspaper picture or a name written down on a small piece of paper can also do.

5. Roll out the dough.

6. Use the gingerbread form to create a human-like figure.

We have tried and it worked for us. Just be patient, sometimes it works just like that, other times it dawns on us that it took a few years. Believe!

7. Bake for 13 min. at 190°C.

8. Cool on a wire rack.

9. Decorate with icing until the cake figure resembles the one you want to return the bad energy to.

10. Take the cake figure with you to a cemetery (preferably at a full moon – when it’s the best working light conditions).

11. Create an optional ritual arrangement, for example with some candles or flowers.

12. Inflict the desired damage on the cake figure while cursing the target person. Be concentrated.

13. Leave the scene. Don’t look back.